Childhood Demons
by IguanaMom
Summary: A murderkidnapping case brings up some old memories for Greg.
1. Default Chapter

Childhood Demons

Authors:  Sandersgirl and ScifiSand.

Disclaimer:  We do not own CSI. They belong to CBS and Alliance-Atlantis Productions.   

Summary:  A murder/kidnapping case brings up some old memories for Greg.

Rating:  PG-13 to be on the safe side. 

Category:  Greg Angst. 

Greg Sanders was nervous.  He'd only worked in the field a half dozen times.  His boss Gil Grissom had been going fairly easy on him.  So far most of his assignments had been robberies.  Grissom had been easing him into the more grisly crime scenes. 

Today was his first homicide and boy was it a doozy.  Scott and Sharon Sparks had been brutally murdered, their ten year old son Andrew was missing.  Grissom had assigned Greg to help him on the case.

 Greg walked into the Sparks' family room.  The television set was still on in the corner.  Jay Leno was chatting away with Mel Gibson, both of them unaware that they were covered in the couples spattered blood.  The Sparks were sitting on the couch as if they were watching T.V., eyes open but unseeing.  The smell of fresh blood was strong in this room.  Greg's stomach churned. 

_"I'm going to hurl!_"  Greg thought to himself.  He ran for the front door.  He threw open the door, ran down the steps and vomited.... right on a pair of nice black shoes. 

"Whoops, Sorry." He said as he looked up, right into the eyes of Lieutenant Brass. 

"CRAP !" He said aloud. 

"That's okay Greg.  First murder scene can be tough." Brass replied.  "I understand, just don't ever do that again."

"Do my best." Greg cringed in reply. 

Brass and Greg were outside the house when Grissom came out. Brass was cleaning his shoes with a disgusted look in his face and Greg was looking at him, guilty."There's no trace of the boy in the house " Grissom said.

Brass finished cleaning his shoes and stood up. "What do you think? They took the boy with them?"  He asked.

"I don't know... Maybe. Greg, are you ok?"Greg, who had been listening to their conversation, suddenly paled."What? Yeah, I-I'm fine.""He isn't used to blood " Brass joked, before walking into the house again.Grissom looked at Greg. "You don't have to go inside again if you don't want to. It's your fist homicide and it's gorier than most CSI's first homicides .""I'm fine " he replied smiling weakly.Grissom looked at him suspiciously before walking into the house, Greg inhaled deeply and followed him.


	2. Part 2

Krazy – Go ahead and archive.

I want to thank Sandersgirl for all her work on this fic. She's done the majority of the work here. I hope you like this part.

My mom is in the hospital. Hopefully I'll be able to work on the fic some this weekend but who knows. I'd appreciate your prayers.

Please review. I kinda like those things.

**CHILDHOOD DEMONS – Part 2**

It had been three hours since Greg had set foot at his first murder scene. They had decided that the Sparks' son Andrew has been in the house in bed when his parents were killed. There were signs of a struggle in the boys bedroom. Neighbors had heard gunshots coming from the Sparks' home around 10:45 PM. They looked out their family room window to see two men running from the house, dragging someone along with them. They then called the police.

While Brass was questioning the neighbors, Grissom and Greg were inspecting Andrew's bedroom.

There weren't any signs of blood in the room and Greg was grateful for that. He didn't want to puke again, especially in front of his boss.

The senior CSI was working on the kid's bed, taking pictures. Greg was looking for anything that was out of place in the boy's room.

Grissom took a picture of the pillow and looked at Greg.

"Greg, what do you think?"

The younger man seemed to be deep in his thoughts and didn't hear the question.

"Greg?"

At the mention of his name Sanders looked up.

"Huh?"

"What do you think? You have a theory?"

Greg smiled a little. This was an opportunity to show off, it was what he wanted, but not today.

He thought for a moment and then walked to the room's door.

"We know there were two guys, that's what the neighbors say, I think they forced open the back door and went straight to the family room. They knew the Sparks were there, they probably saw them through the window."

Greg walked into the hallway and faced the family room door.

"They walked into the room and shot them. It was too fast, they didn't have time to react. They were going to leave but then... then the boy appeared, he was here. He... he had been awake too, in his bedroom. He probably was in his bed, lights off, reading some comics under the covers, using a flashlight..."

It wasn't about Andrew Spark anymore.

"He didn't hear the intruders come in but... he heard the shots. He knew they were shots, he has heard them before in movies ... lots of times. He was afraid but he decided to see what was happening. He stopped here when... when he saw the blood...he could smell it... it was everywhere..."

But Greg wasn't looking at the blood on the walls, his eyes were looking at something that wasn't there.

"Greg. Greg?"

Grissom put his hand on Greg's shoulder, startling him. He blinked a few times, as if he had been dreaming, before looking at his boss with a confused look.

"What?"

"I think you should go back to the lab, okay?"

Greg nodded absently and left the house in a daze. Grissom watched him go thinking that maybe they should talk.

* * *

Grissom found Greg in the DNA lab analyzing samples collected at the Sparks' home. Greg had acted strangely at the crime scene. The scenario that he had come up with was just a bit too detailed and personal. It made Grissom wonder. He debated whether he should wait until the end of shift to ask Greg about it or do it now.

"_The sooner the better_" he thought as he entered the lab's doorway.

"Greg. Do you have a minute?"

"Yeah, sure Grissom." Greg replied cheerily, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. "Whatcha need?"

"To talk about what happened at the crime scene earlier. You seemed a bit out of it. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Just tired I guess."

"Well if you need anything I'm here." Grissom replied. He didn't want to push Greg to talk so he just let him know that he was available if needed.

* * *

Greg sat in the break room staring at the brewing coffee dripping into the pot. He was scared, scared that Grissom would find out his secret. The last thing he wanted was for the people he worked with to know about his painful past. He worked so hard to repress the memories, to pretend that he was just like everyone else. But he wasn't like everyone else. He had a secret that if the others knew they would treat him differently. He had to get his act together. He couldn't let the Sparks' deaths and the abduction of their son get to him. He really wanted to be a CSI, to be able to look the bad guys in the eye and say "you're busted". If he was ever going to be one he'd have to be able to put his past behind him.

* * *

Grissom sat in his office thinking about the Sparks case. They didn't have much to work with just some blood, that probably belonged to the couple, and a hair. Just that, a short brown hair found on Andrew's bed.  
  
That poor boy was God knows where, scared, probably hurt or worse and all he could do was think while he waited for results. He felt useless. He hated feeling useless.   
  
The door was open, but Catherine knocked anyway.  
  
Grissom looked up.  
  
"I've been in the autopsy room. Robbins needs to talk to you about your vics..."  
  
Let's hope he has something good, he thought. Then he left the room so quickly that Catherine didn't have time to finish the sentence.  
  
"You're welcome", she said

* * *

"What do you have?", Grissom asked as he stormed into the autopsy room.  
  
Robbins was working on Mrs. Sparks' corpse, suturing her chest. Behind them   
Mr. Sparks lay lifeless on another table.  
  
"Nothing I'm afraid", Robbins replied. "Just the cause of death, but that   
was easy. Both victims died from a single gunshot to the head. The bullet entered the back of the skull and exited the forehead."  
  
Grissom sighed. It wasn't bad news, but wasn't good either.  
  
"Anything about the kid?" the coroner asked.  
"Nothing at all… unfortunately. Thanks Al." 

* * *

  
  
Grissom walked into the DNA lab where Greg was analyzing some samples. He   
stopped in the doorway and observed the young tech working. He looked the same but something about him had changed after visiting the Sparks' home.  
  
"Anything on the hair?"  
  
Sanders left what he was doing and looked up at his boss.  
  
"Yeah, I found plenty of epithelial's and got DNA from them. Now I need   
something to compare it to."  
  
"Good".  
  
Grissom was leaving the lab, but Greg stopped him. His face was serious, Gil had never seen him so serious.  
  
"Grissom? Would you keep me updated? On the Sparks case, I mean."  
  
Grissom stared at him for a minute before replying.  
  
"Sure."  
  
"Thanks."

* * *

Gil left the lab thinking about Greg. This case was really getting to him. If the tech wanted to be a CSI he needed to learn to keep his feelings out of it.  
  
His thoughts were interrupted by a beeping sound. Grissom flipped open his cell phone and answered it. "Grissom."  
  
"We have a suspect" It was Brass. "Mr. Sparks was the owner of an airline.   
When the company was just starting out he had a partner, John Bender, they built   
it together. When they started making money Mr. Sparks fired him. He accused   
Bender of stealing money from the company's funds. Bender denied it. There are   
also some witnesses that saw Bender threatening Mr. Sparks on a couple of occasions."  
  
"Does he have an alibi for last night?" Grissom asked.  
  
"I don't know. I'm going to pay him a little visit, you coming?"  
  
"See you in five minutes." 

Grissom closed his phone and smiled. He stuck his head into the DNA lab doorway.

"Hey Greg, do you have anything pressing going on?"

"No boss, just waiting for some results. It'll be three or four hours before their ready."

"Good. Then grab your field kit. We have a suspect to visit."


	3. Part 3

Well, this chapter was longer but I've broken it up into two parts. Hopefully the fifth part will be ready by the time that I'm ready to post part four. The next part will explain a few things about Greg's past. I'll post it in a couple days.

My mom is better and should be getting out of the hospital tomorrow. Turned out she had pancreatitis due to 2 gallstones (even thought she does not a gall bladder) caught in the bile duct blocking the opening to the Pancreas. She had the 2 stones removed this morning.

This part was written by Sandersgirl. I just made some corrections and changes.

****

**Childhood Demons - Part 3**

John Bender lived in a modest little house, "modest" being the understatement of the year. Apparently things didn't go very well for him after being fired. He had been accused of stealing from the company's funds and, although they couldn't prove it, it wasn't easy to find a job with that history. 

When they got out of Grissom's Tahoe Greg noticed Brass standing in front of the house, order in hand. He smiled at them as they approached.

"You got a search warrant already?" Grissom asked, indicating the paper in the Captain's hand.

Brass nodded. "Yeah, apparently Mr. Sparks had some very important friends. It was easy."

He turned to Greg, who was standing directly behind his boss.

"Hi Greg, nice to see you again. Are you ready for your first interrogation?"

Greg nodded and grinned.

"I think so."

"Ok. Let's go then."

Brass walked to the main door, followed by the CSIs. He knocked.  
A tall, thin, man opened the door. He was in his mid forties with brown hair graying around the temples. He wore khaki pants and a light blue shirt. Like his house, his clothes were modest but tidy. You could see that the guy was a perfectionist.

He smiled, but Grissom could sense that he didn't like visitors.

"Good morning. Can I help you?"

"Yes you can" Brass said, flashing him his ID. "I'm Captain Brass, and this is Gil Grissom and Greg Sanders from the Crime Lab."

Greg noticed that Bender's face tensed, but he kept smiling politely.

"I suppose you want to ask me about Scott Sparks?"

"Yes, and we have an order to search your house if necessary."

They were silent for a moment.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to be rude." John Bender said. "Come in, please".

Brass entered, followed by Grissom and Greg. Bender looked at them, analyzing them.

"I don't like this guy at all", Greg thought as John Bender closed the door behind them.

Grissom had been right. Bender was indeed a perfectionist. Nothing in that house was out of place. It reminded him his own home. 

They sat in his living room. Grissom, Brass and Greg sat together on the couch, and Bender sat in a chair in front of them. That way he had control over the situation.

Brass was the first one to speak.

"When was the last time you saw Scott Sparks?"

"A couple of months ago. The company had a big banquet in one of those expensive restaurants. I don't remember which one though. I had tried to talk to him before, telling him that I didn't steal from those funds, but he never wanted to listen so I went there and..."

"And you threatened him," Brass said.

"No, no, no, it didn't happen that way."

"There are witnesses that saw you threatening him"

"He didn't want to listen to me... he ignored me in front of all those people and I got mad, but I wasn't serious."

Grissom looked at him with curiosity. When he first saw him his impression of John Bender was that he was quiet. Now he looked as if he was losing his temper and he was trying very hard to control himself.

"Sure", Brass said.

Bender was about to reply when Grissom calmly said.

"We need to take a DNA sample Mr. Bender, and we need to search the house. Are you ok with that?"

Bender nodded.

"Greg, take a DNA sample from Mr. Bender while I inspect the house."

"Ok."

Brass and Grissom left Greg alone with Mr. Bender. That made Greg nervous, being alone with a murder suspect wasn't what he wanted to do at that moment.

_"But the house isn't very big_", he thought, "I_f I shout they'll hear me. God, stop being so paranoid."_

"Excuse me, are you ok?"

John Bender was looking at him as if he had a third eye on his forehead.

"What? Oh, yeah, sorry", he answered, blushing.

He opened his field kit and put on a pair of gloves. Then he took a swab.

"Sir, can you open your mouth, please?"

Bender did as he was asked and Greg took the swab with shaky hands.

"Is this your first time?"

He didn't answer. He put the swab into the field kit and his gloves in a plastic bag, as Grissom had taught him.

"You believe me, don't you? You know I didn't do it."

Greg looked up at Bender. He didn't know what to say, and that didn't happen very often.

"It doesn't matter what I think, just what the evidence says", he replied. He gathered his thing and went to find Grissom and Brass.


	4. Part 4

This is the last part that was already written when we posted part One. The next part is being worked on but it will be awhile. Thanks a lot for the reviews.

Please Review.

**Part Four******

Grissom and Greg were in Grissom's Tahoe on the way back to the lab. They had been silent since they left Bender's, Gil wasn't a talkative person and Greg was once again deep in thought.

Grissom looked at the young man, he looked sad. "_Okay"_, he thought, _"Let's try again."_

"Greg?"

"Mmh?" he replied absently.

"Are you going to tell me what's wrong with you or do I have to guess?"

"I'm fine..."

Grissom parked the car on the right side of the road, turned off the engine and glared at Greg.

"What is it?"

Greg didn't look at his boss, he simply stared at his hands.

"Nothing", he mumbled.

"We aren't going anywhere until you tell me what's the matter with you."

Greg felt the impulse to open the door and run away, but he stayed in the car, staring at his hands. He sighed.

"It's just... this is bringing back memories. That's all."

"The Sparks case?"

Greg looked at him fearful and nodded.

"Look Greg, if you don't want to talk about it it's okay..."

"No, you brought it up and...I need to tell somebody, even if it's you", he smiled and then took a deep breath. "When I was 10 some men broke into my house and killed my parents. I was in my room and I heard noises. I went to their room and I saw… everything."

A single tear rolled down his cheek, he wiped it away and smiled weakly at Grissom, but the smile didn't reach his eyes.

"Just like the Sparks case", he added, "quite a coincidence, isn't it?"

Grissom just sat there, looking at Greg, not knowing what to say or do next. He wished Catherine were there, she was the people person, not him.

"Did they take you with them?"

Greg nodded. He couldn't look his boss in the eye.

"How long..."

"Two weeks. Then I got away."

Grissom thought for a moment.

"I want you off this case."

Greg turned to him quickly.

"No Grissom you can't do that. I need to work on this case."

Grissom shook his head.

"No, you are compromising the case."

The younger man looked at him with pleading eyes.

"You don't understand, I NEED to help with this case Grissom. Please."

Grissom thought for what seemed, to Greg, like hours, and then spoke.

"Ok, but if I see that this is affecting your work you're out, got that?"

Greg nodded.

Grissom reached to turn on the engine, but Greg stopped him.

"Just one more thing, don't tell anybody about this, ok?"

Grissom nodded.

"Don't worry."


	5. Part 5

Authors Notes:  

This chapter has more description than some people probably like.  I seem to do a lot of description where Sandersgirl does more dialog.  I hope you like it. 

Rach:  Yes my mom is much better and back to work.  Thanks for asking. 

Thanks for all the great reviews.  We really appreciate them.  Sorry this chapter is so short. 

Darn those green underlines in MS Word are annoying aren't they?  I think I've satisfied them and they are all gone now.  Annoying little beasts they are.

Childhood Demons - Part Five 

****

Greg heard yelling.  A voice was yelling "NO! NO! STOP!" He bolted up from his seat in the breakroom, head whipping around to see where the yelling was coming from.  Just then Nick came running into the room.  

Greg, Greg! You okay man?  I could hear you yelling all the way down the hall.  What's up?"

Greg lowered his eyes away from Nick.

"_Oh man was that me yelling_?" Greg wondered,  "_I must have fallen asleep_."

"I'm okay man.  I fell asleep, dreamt I was being chased by a bunch of mimes.  He joked half- heartedly. 

"Okay Greggo.  Well, gotta get back to work.  Catch ya later buddy.  Watch out for those creepy mimes, they give me the willies." Nick joked. 

Greg sighed.  "_Man I **wish** I had been dreaming about mimes_." He thought.  "_Or clowns, clowns would have been good_."

 Greg was trying to cheer himself up.  It wasn't working.  He couldn't stop thinking about Andrew Sparks.  He had to find the boy, before it was to late.  Greg needed to do it, not just for the kid, but for himself.  He couldn't let it happen again.  He couldn't let someone else go through what he had. 

He decided to go back to the crime scene.  Maybe they had overlooked something.  He couldn't just sit here.  He had to do something, anything.  He knew he should tell Grissom where he was going but he wanted to be alone right now.

There were still some uniformed officers at the scene.  Greg walked past them, showing his I.D. as he went.  He went straight to the boys' room. Trying to ignore the grizzly scene in the family room as he walked past.  Greg pulled on a pair of gloves and went to work searching the room.  He had no idea what he was looking for but hopefully something would jump out at him.  He spotted some books on a stand.  Picking one up he began to read the cover.   Iguana's For Dummies" by Melissa Kaplan.

 Suddenly Greg was no longer standing in the Sparks home.  He was miles away and years past. 

"_Mommy, can I have an Iguana, pretty please?  I'll take good care of it.  I promise_." 

"_No Gregory you **cannot** have an iguana.  No reptiles in my house ever!  Got that_!"

"_But Mommy_."

"_No Gregory, and that's final_!"

That was the first time that Greg had begged his mom for an Iguana.  He thought they were fascinating and beautiful.  He had been six years old.  The day that his parents had been killed his mom had begrudgingly given in.  It had taken four years of begging but he was finally getting an Iguana.  Then **it** happened.  His life had changed forever in one moment.  He never did get that Iguana.  To this day he still secretly wanted one.

Greg snapped back to reality with a start.

"Great.  A flashback.  I haven't had one of those in ages."  He thought aloud. 

"Greg, you okay?"  He heard the unmistakable voice of Gil Grissom ask. 

"_Damn_" Greg thought to himself. 

**Another Note:**  I just couldn't help but put something Iguana related in this fic.  I've decided to dedicate this part to my sweet, beautiful baby boy Igna (Ignatious Iguanagus).  Igna is my Green Iguana.  He is now 4'2" long and growing daily.  _Iguana's for Dummies_ is a real book.  If you or anyone you know ever considers getting an Iguana this book is a must have.  Iguanas are **NOT** good pets for kids. They take a lot of time, attention and TLC. 

On to writing part six.  I hope you all like this story so far.  Remember Read and Review please.  I'm becoming rather addicted to Reviews. 


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